So work is going great, I start writing for money Friday. It is so easy. I'm researching cars now. Another sedan like the Malibu will do nicely for us I think. I am very tired still I think next week will be last week at the Halloween store its just not needed anymore and it just gets in the way of important things. Not having to worry about finding a job has been very liberating. I am beginning to feel creative and the need to express and make something beautiful is getting stronger by the minute. I have a few ideas.....

El Mariachi : It's easier to pull the trigger than play guitar. Easier to destroy than create.

Time to find Susan a different job she is at Macomb Mall setting up some foolish calender store with God knows how many people. Who knows when she'll be home. If its not one thing or another that place sucks every form of animal penis possible. Time to get on with making more money and putting up with less bull shit and useless people. But then again what the hell do I know. All it is really is typical corporate retail nonsense. Changing the qualifications for raises and backstabbing coworkers or employees thereby preventing upward movement. Same story and the results will be the same as they were at Men's Wearhouse and Carlo's.

Dom Portwood : Hello, Peter. What's happening? We need to talk about your TPS reports. Peter Gibbons : Yeah. The coversheet. I know, I know. Uh, Bill talked to me about it. Dom Portwood : Yeah. Uh, did you get that memo? Peter Gibbons : Yeah. I got the memo. And I understand the policy. The problem is, I just forgot this one time. And I've already taken care of it so it's not even a problem anymore. Dom Portwood : Yeah. It's just that we're putting new coversheets on all the TPS reports *before* they go out now. So if you could just remember to do that from now on, that'd be great. Alright!

UPTs.....sounds like a whole bunch of f!%^ that shit.

Up your ass
Push it harder
Turn it sideways

Bottom line change promotes growth and staying in swamp marshlike environment will only continue to strangle the life and happiness and will power from anyone. I know this because since I've left my previous job people have been saying how much more pleasant I am to be around and I actually smile like it means something other than murder.

Jack Torrance : [typed] All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Work was great today. It looks like I'll be getting more responsibilities. Thats ok I'm getting compensated this time. I'm thinking of teaching a women's self defense class on saturdays....any thoughts? Smallville is on tonight! How cool is that.

I think I'll clean the bathroom tonight. I can't wait to leave the Halloween store and have weekends off. Also need to start thinking of a car to buy. I'm leaning towards the Honda Pilot. That woman that lives with me can take the Malibu.

R2-D2 and Chewbacca are playing the holographic game aboard the Millennium Falcon] Chewbacca : Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrgh C-3PO : He made a fair move. Screaming about it can't help you. Han Solo : Let him have it. It's not wise to upset a Wookiee. C-3PO : But sir, nobody worries about upsetting a droid. Han Solo : That's 'cause droids don't pull people's arms out of their sockets when they lose. Wookiees are known to do that. Chewbacca : Grrf. C-3PO : I see your point, sir. I suggest a new strategy, R2: let the Wookiee win.

Just a quick update. Got my first paycheck from Honda today "I'm rich beotch!"
I was told by Roseville police to stay in my house because there is a possible bomb in the bank next door to me I can see it from my front window. There is a robot trying to get to it....sweet.

Wait a minute......there is a frieking bomb less than 100 feet from me? Hmmm I must now switch to Red Dawn mode. Where are my knives?

John Billings : There's a story going around 'bout how some 20 Redcoats got killed by a ghost or some damn thing, carried a Cherokee tomahawk. Benjamin Martin : Aren't you a little old to be believing in ghost stories?

I am so over all the bull shit. So very over all the bull shit. Tired of caring. Tired of trying. Its all for nothing. I feel as if nothing I do is enough for myself or Susan. I don't seem to be acting correctly or responding to any situation the way I'm supposed to. In other words its just another day, week, month or what the fuck ever.

Sometimes I feel surrounded by a cold indifference both from myself and people around me.

Shall I become cold again and be void of feeling and treat others with contempt so that they understand how it feels, even at the risk of losing their relationship?
Some people haven't experienced that before, I think maybe they need to learn to have an apprieciation for what it means to be allowed to stand in my presence.

No I shall be lenient and merciful in all of my interactions with carbon beings that I feel at times simply take up my air and annoy the shit out of me.

I am sick again today, but today I actually made it to work and my boss sent me home when he saw how sick I was. At least he knows I'm not faking. However I do start actually writing next week instead of being the service department slave.

Really not happy right now. No not at all.

Othello : Arise black vengeance from thy hollow cell. Yield up, O love, thy crown and hearted throne to tyrannous hate. Now by yond marble heaven, in the due reverence of a sacred vow, I here engage my words.

Sir Francis Walsingham : Madam, if I may. A prince should never flinch from being blamed for acts of ruthlessness which are necessary for safe guarding the state and their own person. You must take these things so much to heart that you do not fear to strike. Even the very nearest that you have if they be implicated.

I'm sick, apparently last night according to that woman that lives with me my heart was going a mile a minute while I was sleeping and I couldn't stop sweating. So my brain is probably melting away. I am not tired so I can't fall asleep and even if I could I wouldn't want to because I'll probably have more nightmares like I've been having lately.

Trying very hard to get ahold of the Alien vs. Predator game for xbox but it is been a real pain in the dick. Since I can't go anywhere today I might as well reorganize the kitchen and closet. Then add more books to database and work on salsa ideas while Susan is at school so the day isn't a complete waste. We need more space. But it doesn't make any sense to move till she picks a grad school because it may be out of state and why waste the downpayment on an apartment or house if we are going to move again anyway.

Went to Carlo's to see Brian. Brandon seemed very excited about training with me agian so I hope I can get the ball rolling on that real soon. The Halloween store is a real drag I don't want to do it anymore but we need the money so I'll grin and bear it for the time being and just count the days till the weekends are totally free. Two weeks till I join the gym.

Don Diego de la Vega : This is called a training circle, a master's wheel. This circle will be your world, your whole life. Until I tell you otherwise, there is nothing outside of it. Alejandro Murrieta : Capitan Love is... Don Diego de la Vega : There is NOTHING outside of it. Captain Love does not exist until I say he exists. As your skill with the sword improves, you will progress to a smaller circle. With each new circle, your world contracts, bringing you that much closer to your adversary, that much closer to retribution.

Morpheus : I've seen an agent punch through a concrete wall. Men have emptied entire clips at them and hit nothing but air, yet their strength and their speed are still based in a world that is built on rules. Because of that, they will never be as strong or as fast as you can be.

Big week here. Today was my third day at Honda and Susan's second day of school. Work is cool I think it will be very fun and lucrative. Lots of bonuses to be earned and because I am the god of customer service there is no reason for me not to get every bit of it. Susan seems to be enjoying school. I can't wait to find out what my schedule is going to be so I can get on a routine and stuff. Right now I'm very tired and trying to get used to being up at 6:30 every morning. After I get a few checks and we see how the comission thing works we can set up a debt plan and get a second car for Susan. We have a list of things we want to buy my first thing is a membership to a gym with a pool. 30 pounds by Christmas. I have not eaten fast food in close to a week and I feel great, so thats a big step in the right direction.
Time to do the dishes. I'm so tired.

Gordon Gekko : The point is ladies and gentlemen that greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right. Greed works. Greed clarifies, cuts through and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit. Greed, in all of it's forms - greed for life, for money, knowledge - has marked the upward surge of mankind and greed - you mark my words - will not only save Teldar Paper but that other malfunctioning corporation called the USA. Thank you.

Peter Gibbons : So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life. Dr. Swanson : What about today? Is today the worst day of your life? Peter Gibbons : Yeah. Dr. Swanson : Wow, that's messed up.

Jim Young : And there is no such thing as a no sale call. A sale is made on every call you make. Either you sell the client some stock or he sells you a reason he can't. Either way a sale is made, the only question is who is gonna close? You or him? Now be relentless, that's it, I'm done.

Oh and I need two students so I can start teaching any takers?

Gandalf : On the lowest dungeon on top of the highest mountain peak I fought with the Balrog of Morgoth... Until at last I threw down my enemy and smote his ruin upon the mountain side... Darkness took me and I strayed away through thought and time. Stars wield overhead and everyday was as long as a life age of the earth... But it was not the end. I felt life in me again. I've been sent back until my task is done.